How Managing Your Own Emotions Is the Key To Helping Your Kids Manage Theirs

As we all are aware, having children is a rollercoaster of emotions. One moment you’re embracing them in your arms telling them how much you love them, and the next minute you could be questioning if you’re even capable of becoming a good parent.

Our children can take us for a wild ride if we’re not careful, so it’s important to understand some of the best ways to look after our kids so that they can flourish into beautiful and knowledgeable adults in the future.

And one of the most important factors is their emotions.

People often forget just how important it is to manage your emotions. Whether it’s holding back anger or controlling negative thoughts so that they don’t interfere with your life, there’s a lot to think about when it comes to managing your mental state. Unfortunately, children aren’t exactly the best at this because they don’t have experience with fluctuating emotions. They generally need to feel it first before they can cope with it or learn to deal with it.

But that’s where you, the parent, come in. Parents are usually responsible for helping their kids manage their emotions. But more often than not, adults can actually let their own emotions get the better of them, leading to a bad influence or poor advice for their children. Imagine if your child comes home from school angry or upset because of something a classmate said; what are you going to do to react? Some parents might lose it and get mad along with their child. After all, nobody wants their kid to be talked down to–especially not by some other kids! But the right way to diffuse this situation is to help your child deal with the anger in a calm and collected way that encourages them to control their emotions.

Sounds complicated? Don’t worry–it’s a lot easier than you might think. However, it all starts with you, so here’s some sound advice to follow if you want to help your kids manage their emotions.

You need to control your emotions first

As we’ve mentioned in the introduction, you’re the one that needs to control their emotions first–not your kids! After all, you have to set the example and you need to be the one to anchor your kids.

So let’s start with a few deep breaths. Relax yourself, calm down a bit, and try to see things clearly. Ask yourself what your child is upset or angry about. Look at their situation from their point of view, but also any other opposing perspectives. Try to get a zen-like understanding of the situation and open your mind to all the possibilities. Breathe in, breathe out, and calm down! This is the first thing you should be teaching your kids when they let their emotions take over. You should help them soothe their mind and relax by just taking deep breaths and trying to clear their mind of all the negative thoughts and energy that are building up.

Next, encourage your kids to talk about their feelings to someone that they trust. At the beginning, that’s probably going to be you, so you better have an open ear ready to listen to everything they have to say–even if it sounds ridiculous to you! Let them know that you’re there for them. Nudge them a little and convince them to explain what their problems are to you. Think of it this way; if you ever had a bad day at work and ranted about it to your partner, just put yourself in your kid’s shoes! They probably had a horrible day at school, so let them rant about it to you and express their feelings.

At the core of all of this is mindful parenting. It’s not about being perfect–it’s just about understanding what’s going on around you. You should be looking at your child, trying to get an idea of what problems they’re having, and figuring out the best way to relax their emotions while also providing some good advice that will help them feel better.

You’re going to make mistakes at some point, especially if you’ve just found out that some other punk kid is calling your child names at school. But that’s where you bring out the deep breathing exercises, clear your mind, and then talk to your child in a calm and collected manner. Yes, it’s understandable that you’re upset just like your kid is, but you have to be a strong parental force that grounds them in good habits.

Assisting your child with complex emotions

Emotions aren’t easy to understand or embrace–we all know this. You’ve probably had situations where you know what the right thing to do is, but you just can’t bring yourself to make the right decisions and you let anger or sadness take over.

But there are some cases where it’s not possible to just use sheer willpower to get through something, and the same is going to count for your children. There are times where you may need to assess your child’s situation and ask the big question; is this just an emotional thing, or is there more at play here? For example, you may need to consider a natural supplements for ADHD in children because your child has been diagnosed with something. In these situations, you may need to opt for more extreme measures like completely avoiding certain triggers that cause your child to get emotional or upset.

Shielding your child from these kinds of situations is complex and a lot of hard work. Many parents fail to pay attention to any mental health conditions that their child has, and as a result, they often overlook the difficulties that their child may face. So do yourself (and your child) a favor by getting a proper diagnosis. Learn more about your child and the struggles they have to cope with on a regular basis and embrace the idea that they could just be different and have their own way to deal with mental health and emotions.